Monday, June 23, 2008

You get sick with the flu, you start a cucumber farm

I was wiped out last week with what I'm calling a Summer Flu -- Not quite as treacherous as its Winter version, but almost the worse for it being in the middle of hot hot Summer. I recommend the following diet for those in the same predicament:

Sudafed or equivalent
Tom Yum soup, vegetarian if possible
whiskey (despite what everyone says, a little bit of it was the only thing that would salivate my throat)

Oddly enough, when on Saturday evening when I was well enough again to walk around, I craved pizza -- something I can only eat in small doses and on special ocassion (the whole fried cheese and Asian bowels thing). Then on Sunday, when I went outside, I noticed two things: 1. mosquitoes running away from me because I was so toxic with three days of sweat and sleep, 2. my cucumber plants had gone wiggiidy wiggidy wild in the backyard! There was really nothing else to do but make a proper vegetable bed for them....and only when I finished would I shower. (seriously people, I spent several hours in the yard without a single time you got the flu, go to the jungle. Yeah...that makes sense...)

Anyway, it was surprisingly easy to put this together. The key, really, is to enlist help. There is no way to nail anything together like this alone, unless you have a huge garage with a tool shed and table, etc...which in NYC, better be no one, or I hate you.

Also, cross-stack the wood. Looks cool and give the support some integrity. Don't worry so much about screw size or nail size or whatever. Odds are good you aren't keeping this forever, right?

Nothing cures what ails ye like hard friggin' labor and the knowledge one day soon you will have your own homegrown cukes.

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