Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"Deep" Thoughts

I had a funny conversation with a group of variously acclimated foreigners in the US the other night, when we started talking about the election. It occurred to me, and was echoed by others that "election" sounds just like "erection" when you phoneticize it in Japanese.

Ironically so, given how LONG, HARD, and MORE FULFILLING this election was than any of the others I've been around for...

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Me: Mom, so you know Barack Obama, he —
Mom: Huh?
Me: Obama. Barack Obama?
Mom: Oh, you mean the Pokemon?
Me: No! The guy running for president!!!

Looking to fill the void left since Stuff White People Like went analog?
My Mom Is A Fob should do the trick.

(Thanks, Andy)

Monday, November 10, 2008

Obama Dos and Don't-Dos

The Root suggests looks that won't work for president elect.
I personally think a Mr. T Mutton-Mohawk combo would look fabu.

(Thanks Yani)

Friday, November 7, 2008

Mythotypes and Remakes

I have to say this out loud because I want to know I'm not the only one who thought it, but when "Sideways" came out, a couple of us Asian-(North) American ladies thought it a horrid horrid irony that Sandra Oh played the super sexbot sleeper star of the film...what with the title of the film being, well, "sideways"...

(long pause)

Now The Guardian reports there's a Japanese remake of the film in the pipeline...and I can't help but think who's gonna be the "sideways" love interest with a Japanese cast? Directional orientation is in the eye of the beholder, maybe?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

JFK Terminal 5 went to the future and came back

It's been all of four weeks since I was last at JetBlue in NYC, but I was stunned to be rerouted through a Skywalk to what looks like a weird appropriation of the future-past as airport terminal. Everything is designed around the shape of a circle, and feels like an international airport. There's even a duty-free shop.

But check this out:

I go to the food court to get some overpriced dinner before I board, when what to my delight there is an Asian food stand with things like "charbroiled pork bao" and "udon noodle soup." I wasn't that hungry so I ordered the $4.50 hot n' sour soup (you really can't fuck up with h n' s, I say -- you cover a bunch of vegetable quotas, plus it's spiced with vinegar instead of msg).

Anyway, $4.50 is a lot for poor-man's Chinese-American stew, but it's an airport so I'm forgiving.

Then, the cashier hands me this:That is a HALF-GALLON of soup.

WTF?

Best of the Election 2008

(thanks, Ryan)
Best Cartoon

Best media commentary:
(Something to the effect of) "This shouldn't be America's excuse to say it doesn't have race problems. It should be an opportunity for us to talk about the ones that exist." --Tavis Smiley

Best joke:
"The election was called early because McCain probably wanted to go to bed." (Thanks, Sanford)

Best reaction:
Jesse Jackson

Worst part of the coverage:
Will.i.am's hologram "popping" on CNN to Anderson Cooper

First thing I said when the cameras panned over Hyde Park:
"A lot of children are going to be conceived tonight."

Best Post-Election Viral (UPDATED UPON REMEMBERING LATE NIGHT TEXT MESSAGE):
"Ladies, shave your coochies in honor of Obama's win. NO MORE BUSH!!"
I just thought of an amazing new euphemism for meals composed of seafood and land mammal food:

Net and Cage

haha awww

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

About a phone booth

It just occurred to me that suspense-action film will lose its last shred of dignity when phone booths disappear for good. I mean, Superman hasn't gone into a phone booth since at least 1983, and I'd argue anything after Superman 2 wasn't worth watching anyway. Trinity and Neo converged at the end of their phone booth honeymoon to "Zion" and look what happened. Matrix Reloaded and Revolutions sucked Hugo (Weaving) balls.

And of course, without the phone booth, The Bourne Identity/Supremacy would just be Matt Damon looking like a refugee; Law & Order would never have a phone trace to the nearest dumpster (where the gun/drugs/dead hooker ALWAYS is); and Colin Ferrell would never have had the chance to star in this gem:
Action Films, YOUR LIFE IS ON THE LINE.

Putting a little extra honey in the pot -- T-shirts!


Alright kids. It's election Tuesday. You already know what to do.

Moving on...

I came
I saw
I Concord!
(qty is listed as 15 but I definitely have more, and they're actually a heather grey short-sleeved Hanes shirt)