Marketing Jargon

I occasionally have to analyze how I feel about marketing jargon and I've recently decided there is nothing wrong with marketing jargon. Just a matter of perspective. Jazz music critics have gotten away with all kinds of neologisms, for example, but who's gonna slap the guy who writes McCoy Tyner got all pentatonic on his bebop? No one. Actually...maybe that's a bad example, as I'd probably slap the computer screen upon reading that.

Marketers are unfortunately just tacky. Our language is derivative but efficient.

THAT SAID. Here are some things I (have heard but) will never say in the context of marketing:

Lock and load.
Make this thing pop/jump/fly.
Let's start throwing some dates around. (As opposed to just asking, "when are you free?")

(Sorry to those who use those phrases. Again, don't have a problem with hearing them. I love all sinners.)

ALSO. I'd love to hear these other metaphors in their stead.
I might even take bets they'll start circulating:

You ready to fight?
Let's lube this thing so everyone's happy.
What's our equinox?